The Back-to-School Self-Care Crisis: Why You Need a Trip on the Calendar
For many of us, the start of September feels less like a cozy return to routine and more like jumping from a peaceful raft on a lake into a raging river of rapids. As a former teacher, I remember that jolt all too well. It was a familiar melancholy—the loss of summer's unstructured freedom, the effortless days of building forts and swimming until our fingers looked like grotesque gray raisins.
But with September came the "second shift." Water bottles, dance bags, and stinky hockey gear would tumble into the minivan, kicking off a season of endless schedules, games, and homework wrestling. And after the cozy chaos of the holidays, the long Minnesota winter would set in, bringing the bleak reality of January 2nd—a messy house, a dried and brittle Christmas tree, and nothing to look forward to.
This is where travel planning saved me. It became my mental escape hatch. In the hours between carpooling and hockey practice, I could read books and study maps, dreaming of a mid-winter getaway for my family. The simple act of planning gave me a much-needed light at the end of the tunnel. It was more than a chore; it was a form of self-care and a promise of freedom to come.
The Invisible Work of the Family Vacation
As a woman, I'm speaking from my own experience, but I know many men also carry the role of primary caregiver. For us, the job doesn't end when you get to the beach. We can get caught in the "glorified babysitter" trap, where a vacation turns into a new location for cooking, cleaning, and managing logistics. You can come home from vacation more exhausted than when you left.
Roles don’t magically change on vacation. If you're the one who usually manages the household chores, you will likely still be doing them away from home. This can be exhausting and lead to resentment. A truly restorative vacation needs a new approach. It should be a chance for you to recharge, not just change your location.
Vacation Options for Self-Care
If you're yearning for a vacation for yourself but still want to enjoy it with your family, here are a few options to consider:
Cruises: Think of this as a floating all-inclusive resort. Your stateroom, meals, and basic beverages are included. Most major cruise lines have complimentary kids’ clubs with scheduled activities, allowing parents to have some alone time. They even offer adults-only spaces. For the adventurous, there are dozens of shore excursions to fit all ages. You can even pay to have your laundry done!
All-Inclusive Resorts: Imagine a cruise on land. Like cruising, your room, meals, and most beverages are included in the price. Many resorts have fantastic kids’ clubs or babysitting services so you can have time to yourself without having to worry about the kids.
Adventure Tours: Imagine an entire adventure laid out for you and your family. Your hotels, transportation, meals, and excursions are all included. You really only need to show up. You will have a guide who handles all the logistics, allowing you and your kids to focus on the experience. For example, you could take a trip to Ireland where you make scones in an Irish farmhouse or watch your teens learn hurling, the national sport. These tours can even include specific activities for kids while the adults enjoy their own themed outings, like a whiskey tasting.
It is not selfish to ask for some solo time on vacation. It can be revitalizing to send the kids off with the other parent so you can have some time to yourself, whether it's reading a book under a palm tree or simply enjoying the peace and quiet.
A Calendar for Your Soul
Here’s where this is all related to the back-to-school season. September is the perfect time to map out the school year, while the calendar is fresh in your mind. This is your chance to pencil in your travel goals. Having a plan will give you something to look forward to.
The amount of planning you need to do depends on whether you plan it yourself or hand it off to a travel advisor. The earlier you book, the more options you will have, giving you the pick of the litter.
Fall Break and Holiday breaks: Fall breaks are typically short. And holiday breaks usually come with the caveat of spending time with extended family or friends. So consider something closer to home. If you're visiting relatives, maybe they can share the caregiving tasks so you get a break.
Spring Break: This allows for longer vacations, so you can consider destinations like an all-inclusive in Mexico, an adventure tour to Machu Picchu, or a Caribbean cruise. Booking in September gives you a head start.
Booking early also allows you to make smaller, more manageable payments rather than a final lump sum.
Your Homework Assignment
I wouldn’t be a good teacher if I didn’t give you a homework assignment. Take out your favorite calendar and carve out some time for self-care. This is not a spa day or a manicure, but the simple act of pulling out a calendar and beginning to plan your next escapes.
Traveling as a family is a remarkable way to reconnect and "find each other" again. To make the planning part of the adventure, get the whole family involved. Read books whose stories take place in your destination or watch documentaries and movies about the area.
This way, the planning becomes a chance to create an experiential gift for everyone—including yourself. Trip planning doesn’t have to be a chore if you plan ahead. And always remember that a good travel advisor can guide you through the process or, if you'd rather, take care of all the logistics for you.
Most importantly, remember that it’s not selfish to do something wonderful for yourself. You will be happier for it, and your family will get the best version of you.
Randi is a writer, travel advisor, and former teacher helping you find courage, connection, and adventure through travel. Learn more at www.rwingtravel.com
